© 11 Colin Melbourne
Darling, I’ve sinned against you
Q: If a man lusts in his heart, does he need to confess it to his wife? Blake
A: You refer to Christ’s “Sermon on the Mount” where He raised the bar sinners have to jump to reach God’s standard of holiness. Mtt. 5:27-29 KJV;
Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.
And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.
It is one thing to see a beautiful woman and recognise that she is physically attractive, God’s handiwork.
It is another thing to lust after her sexually.
A rose is beautiful; it is possible to appreciate beauty without lusting after it.
When you lust in your heart after a woman, Almighty God in the Flesh said that you have already committed adultery with her.
God The Judge, says there’s no difference between heart-lust and committing adultery.
They are the same in God’s Book.
Adultery is a mortal sin under the Mosaic Law of God. Ex. 20:14, Dt. 5:18. The sentence is death. Lev. 20:10. It was usually carried out by strangulation, sometimes by stoning. De. 22:23.
Adulterers are repeatedly warned in the New Testament to repent, or perish and face eternal Judgment. Heb. 13:4, 1 Co. 6:9, 6:18, Eph. 5:3-7, Col. 3:5-7, 1 Tim. 1:10, Rev. 21:8, 22:15.
“She’ll never know…”
Do you have to confess heart-adultery to your wife so that she can forgive you?
If you desire to walk with God, and develop a godly relationship with your wife, of course you do. Jn. 1:9, Heb. 13:4, Jas. 5:16.
Without integrity of heart we get nowhere with God. Ps. 66:18, 1 Jn. 3:21-22.
Does walking with God and telling your wife the truth frighten you? If so, there’s a major problem in your life that needs sorting out.
Until then, you’re building on sand. But let’s short-cut to the root cause of the sin of adultery.
Libraries of books exist about divorce, but most are plain wrong. This is the best one: Marriage and divorce.
The Six Keys: How to overcome lust in the heart
The cause of adultery is a lack of integrity and personal holiness in your relationship with the LORD Jesus Christ.
Get that right, and everything will blossom: No flies in the ointment, no spots on the petals, no dark clouds on the horizon. It’s not difficult, and it doesn’t take long.
- Make certain you are truly saved, a Christian, not a nominal “Christian”, a mere church-goer, or in a religious cult. Only the New Creation can follow Christ, not old sinners.
- Get filled with the Holy Spirit so that you can walk in the Spirit. You need the power baptism to witness for the Living Christ.
- Feed on the word of God, be nourished by Him all the time. Read the Bible, meditate on the Word, keep your eyes on Jesus, and your thoughts fixed on Him. Jn. 15:4-8, Phil. 4:8-9, Heb. 2:1, 3:1, 12:2.
- Learn to discern the voice of God in your heart and listen to Him constantly. Rom. 8:9-14.
- Do what the word and Spirit of God tell you to do. Don’t just listen, ACT ON God’s Word. Jas. 1:22.
- Keep yourself in the Love of God, walking in love with Him, basking in His Love for you, and your desire to be faithful to Him (and your wife) will grow supernaturally. You will spurn every thought of unfaithfulness. 1 Co. 13, 1 Jn. 1:5-7, 3:21-24.
That’s all there is to it.
Start now; and thank God you are under grace not law, and don’t forget to ask your wife’s forgiveness.
© 11 Colin Melbourne
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